It was the end of the year and the school holiday break was FAST approaching. Before I knew it we’d be swamped with places to go, people to see, and ALL the things to do. So what did I do differently this year? What did I do instead? Nothing. That’s right, I nixed all the plans we were going to have and opted for something different: let kids be BORED.
I’m that mom who plans. I plan ALL the things: all the outings, all the adventures, all the play dates, all the activities, all the fun! With three boys ranging from ages two to 10, having a plan is the way to go because life just seems a little less chaotic that way. But when it comes to the end of the year where the older two are home for the eternity of two weeks, I usually go into supercharged planning mode. My usual end of December/beginning of January calendar would be filled and spilling over with places we’d visit and things we’d experience. Not only do I plan for our usual time together (early morning and afternoon/evenings), but now I have to find ways to fill the hours between 7:30am to 3:30pm. But this time around, instead of filling our time with going to see this and that holiday-themed something or other, making all the Christmas crafts and things of the like, and being the dog-and-pony show for three adoring pairs of eyes, I opted for NONE OF IT. I was ready to let kids be bored.
What We Did
I kept it pretty simple. I wanted my boys to realize that they have a lot already, and to learn to rely on one another. My husband had recently watched a documentary and noted one thing he took away from it that has now stuck with me: use what you have because why even have it if you’re not using it to its full potential? I know they have many things in the confines of their four walls. I know this because we are the ones who purchased many of those things. I let go of the notion of going out to find fun. I had unscheduled time during the day and all they did was find things they had (things they didn’t realize or remember they had) and turned to one another to make fun.
My ten-year-old, in his bored state, turned to organization. He’s always been the type to keep to himself for the most part. And now he found a way to channel the time of not doing anything with organizing (and purging) the things he did have. He went so far as not only doing this in his room, but in the game room WITHOUT BEING TOLD TO DO SO. #MOMWIN! My younger boys (ages five and two) played with any and all things they could get their sticky little hands on. All three actually played together. They had a blast! We occasionally went out to run errands (get the car washed, grab a few groceries, etc.) to break up the day but I was intentional in not letting this time of the year be something stressful as it typically is. Letting them be bored wasn’t something that was planned either. I had a running list starting at the beginning of November. It just so happened that I did not want to bog myself down with ALL the things. I guess you could say that them being bored came from me being selfish with how we spent our time. And that’s totally okay.
What We Learned
I’d be lying if I said that this unscheduled time didn’t come with some drawbacks, the occasional brawl (did I mention I have ALL boys!?), but it was expected and they managed. If nothing else, they learned how to use their words, which is always a good thing. I realized that one day they’ll be as old as I am, and won’t remember all the places we visited. Yeah, they’ll remember (hopefully) the family vacations and those bigger moments. But as for the small stuff: play dates, the jungle gyms, little adventures—they may not remember all of those. They will, however, remember that I was there. That I was present and even though I may have been going crazy during some of our time together, I loved them. I learned to not have the dreaded MOM GUILT because we weren’t out doing all the things. I focused on less and in the end, I know that counts for so much more. Anxious to let kids be bored? Try it; I bet you will be surprised!