When you meet the father of your unborn children, nowhere in your headspace is the thought, “One day, I will need you to be sterile.” Yet, here we are. We asked our Collin County Moms Team when they knew it was time for a vasectomy, and here is what they said:
“Two babies with reflux and one with over seven months of colic. Also, our oldest was conceived while I was on the pill, so we didn’t trust birth control. God has a sense of humor.”
“#3 was not on the menu.”
“I told him I birthed three babies; it was his turn to do something.”
“We had met our deductible, so I talked him into it based on the price.”
“My pregnancies were hard on me and got progressively harder with each child, so after number three…snip.”
“I am a total planner and told him that I would be stressed out the rest of my life that we’d have a surprise if he didn’t.”
“I thought I was pregnant with a third child and it really scared me. We found out there were options to ease his anxiety and we made the appointment right away.”
“Funny” vasectomy shirts read, “Snipped but still equipped,” “pPulp, no seeds,” and the ever-so popular term used among my husband’s peers, “Neutered.” All joking aside, though, my husband and I are about a month out and are so thankful we moved forward with the procedure.
Everything You Want to Know about Vasectomies
I say “we” in good faith because when I was pregnant, we embraced the colloquial “we” as most couples do. So if “we” were pregnant, then ”we” were going to get a vasectomy. You have to accept that he must rest. You will be thankful you did when day four rolls around and he’s close to getting back to his normal routine. Be mindful that he will be sore, swollen, may have mild low belly pain, and need a little extra TLC. Also take proper precautions until his swimmers get tested starting at eight weeks post procedure.
Full disclosure: It was more painful to watch my husband putter around the house those first 48 hours than I think he actually felt. Yes, it’s a vulnerable place but it’s also a highly sensitive mind game for them. To help ease the anxiety, most men opt for the Versed or some other form of mild, anti-anxiety medication coupled with local anesthetic to numb the scrotum. Others, and you must pay extra for this, he can choose to be sedated under conscious sedation or twilight anesthesia. He will take a nice short nap and in about 8-10 minutes his Vas Deferens will be severed. The total length of the procedure usually takes 30-45 minutes from start to finish.
Here are some tips and tricks to help your man through planning and the impending 48 hour…or (let’s be real) week-long recovery.
Vasectomy Research.
Did you know that there’s more than one way to perform a vasectomy? Did you know they offer vasectomies under anesthesia? Gasp! Neither did I! There are scalpel and non-scalpel vasectomies, both basically doing the same procedure but one is marketed as “less invasive.” You can also pay a little extra for an anesthesiologist to be in the room and put your husband under twilight anesthesia (Propofol).
Tighty Whities.
He will need this for support post procedure. It isn’t an option; he will need the support. There will be swelling down there…hopefully minimal, but swelling nonetheless.
Ice packs.
They make ice packs specifically for vasectomies called Tuff Nuts. While we did not splurge for this hilariously shaped ice-pack, we did make use of all those frozen veggies in the back of the freezer.
Rest.
Schedule it around a sporting event, golf tournament, or perhaps his favorite TV show to binge. Just be full-on prepared for a whole lot of lounging. The more rest he can get in the first 48 hours, the better he will feel as he recovers.
Protection After a Vasectomy.
Until you get those swimmers tested at the eight-week post-op mark, make sure to use protection. It is not an instant result and most men take three months post-vasectomy to become sterile. Specimens will be tested anywhere from 8-12 weeks.
